I just watched
Ong Bak 2... Man oh man... I think this is the epidome of "
all braun, no brains". 1/5 stars.
CAUTION: Spoiler ahead. (As a matter of fact, the movie was a spoiler...)
I take nothing away from the heart thumping action that Tony Jaa delivers, together with his crew. I could feel every bone break, every neck slashed, every "bish" and "bash". But what I couldn't feel was the logic. Guys jumping in from everywhere even after he cleaned house. Bad guys appearing for no apparent reason. Defeating the goons one by one (or two by two) to get to the boss who has an evil laughter, and, surprise surprise, who has a few more goons guarding him.
***Spoiler ended.
Seems like an 80's Jackie Chan movie remake to me. Really exciting stuff, back then.
But what grinded my gears was the guy beside me. Not my mate, no. The other side. Here's why:
1) He was taking a sip out of his LARGE coke every 10 to 20 seconds. Every time he drank, he would put it back in the cup holder with a thud, making the armrest vibrate. After finishing his mega drink, he opens a bottle of mineral water and continues drinking. Oh ya, did I mention that he would sip the remaining 1 to 2ml or melted ice together with his mineral water that made a repeatedly slurping sound? (The thumping and thudding continues...)
2) He would shake his leg (and by good/bad chance, the leg closer to me) every once in a while, and who can forget the ocassional crossing of the leg, which the sole of the other foot repeatedly brushes on the side of your clean and washed jeans.
3) He would tell his girlfriend/wife "neh neh neh, this is the girl just now", or "wa". His "wa" was really "WA". Fucking shut up already. Or divorce him or whatever, because girl, he ain't making your money's worth.
What I can conclude is... he is a true defination of an Ugly Singaporean (if he was a Singaporean), and... He was a really big bladder, because he didn't visit the toilet even once throughout the show, much to my dismay. Or, it could be his first time to the movies, because I thought he was going to a picnic, with his snacks and drinks.
"SLURP", "TSK TSK TSK", "WA", "NEH NEH NEH, THAT ONE THAT ONE" - Beautiful percussion intruments accompanying the terrific state of the art Dolby/THX Surround Sound, coming already in theatres near you.